~Kelsey Briggs~ She is gone :'(

...sometimes my heart is to heavy and my mind is too confused, and as much as I look for words to speak they don't come. I am silenced, quiet and in my own world of sadness. Even my best friends can't get through to me today. This is just one of those days that have become most of my days. I can't seem to find the words to describe how I feel. I wish I wouldn't have to feel this way. Everything and all my emotions evolve around one precious little girl. If you haven't heard of the Kelsey Shelton Smith Briggs story yet, then I would recommend you do so. Kelsey died from child abuse. She suffered 9 months of cruel pain. This is the link to her story http://heavens-gates.com/kelseybriggs/. Or watch the video with full details on her life. Made by the special ShonyaKay http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWow42TCwzg I am not sharing her story to ruin your day or make you feel sad. I am sharing her story to bring awareness. A lot of people have spoken that because of reading these stories they feel like working with children victims of abuse. This is how I started. One story, one beautiful girl and a lifetime knowing she is gone forever. This is how I got involved and decided to pursue my new wanted dream to STOP CHILD ABUSE! I am grateful for the memories I have of her. Her beautiful pictures and her living self in video clips, and sometimes I hear a childs laugh in a store that sounds exactly like Kelsey's laugh. I try to hold on to those memories to never forget that she existed, that she mustn't be forgotten, that her voice must be heard. There are times I cry for that baby who is not mine, but someone else's. Sometimes I wish she was my baby. I would have gave her all the love in the world. Every child deserves that. Kelsey's mother had the most beautiful job in the world, to be a loving mother to Kelsey, but she failed. In all the corners of the world she failed to take her daughter out of harms way. As a mother she did what mothers aren't suppose to do choose men after their own children. Because of her selfish need to have a man a precious girl is gone. I saw a clip of Raye Dawn being Railroaded into prison. She said words that made no sense to me ''I love my baby'' she shouted. Maybe she tried to show her innocence by saying what she did, but lets all remember she is the one who failed to protect her only child. She is the one who let her little girl die in pain. I am outraged that she even tries to claim she loves her child. Love is a special word because it means you not only love with your heart, but you also protect and try to keep the other person safe.

Kathie Briggs (Kelsey's grandmother took Kelsey every weekend for a photo shoot. The artistic pictures show Kelsey's beautiful self. Mind you she was more beautiful in person. You would just have to meet her to know that according to members of her family. All her pictures are ethereal and beautiful. I can't stop staring at them. They move me into a another world, a place of beauty and innocence. Kelsey was such a gorgeous being and I wish she knew how much I adore her. If only she didn't have to endure all the pain that she did, if only she didn't have to meet the dark side of her life, if only she was here today bringing so much sunshine to people's life, as she did when she was alive. I would do anything to bring her back, to stop the grieving that are in our hearts. But all this can not be undone. Life has it's cruel ways to make people suffer for someone else's selfish act.
As I was graciously reminded by my friend that “children become angels when they die.” That quote made me smile because I adore angles. I even have quite a collection of guardian angels in my room.
I am still trying to figure out how the universe works. Perhaps it's fate that you hear a child's story and instantly feel connected to that child or maybe this is exactly how the world works. Whatever the theory is I am so grateful for it. Through my wondering and searching on every child that has passed away due to child abuse I have come to know these beautiful children. If it wasn't for my friends constantly updating me on new stories I would have never known those children existed. As much as I am heartbroken reading those heart wrenching stories, I am also thankful for the love that those children give just by existing whether it is in my mind or in reality.
If you haven't heard yet then I will just let you know that every year I honor Kelsey in a beautiful way. Basically what I do is do a mini party on October 11 (the day she passed away) to remember her as the beautiful bubbly girl she was. My aim is to get the whole world together to celebrate with friends and family. I love the idea of friends and family's gathering together to show their support. My party consists of cupcakes and tea. What would your party be like? Thank you to all the people that have participated in Kelsey's remember me party. You are all so beautiful to me.

Much Love Jessie x

Here is a beautiful picture of our angel Kelsey.

Much love to you gorgeous girl Kelsey.

This is how I feel today. I am underneath the world begging for her return. My niece showed the perfect impersonation of my never ending emotions.